An accident! Just want to say...

15 Jan, Thursday evening, our group went to practical at a pig farm of Tanjung Sepat. That's also the pig farm that I went before for two weeks practical during sem break. So, both of us..me and Ing Ing were so excited and happy.
But who knows~ accident happened. She hitted by a lorry when she crossed the road just in front of the pig farm. That scene will never gone out from my brain for the rest of my life. In one glance, I saw her crossed the road back to the bus. Another glance when I turned back, I saw a lorry and seeing her there on the ground and the knocked down sound was so scary that I still can remember untill this moment.
Run to her and gosh..I burst up..crying~
Trying to figure up what to do..but I cannot think at all..BLANK.
What should I do? I want to help, but just dunno how to help her..
What should I do?..I am in panic and really break down at that time.
The feeling of losing somebody is coming back again.
Last time I pray so hard, but I still lose my beloved one.
When all of the feelings came back to me, I can't calm down. Really thank you to some of the friends there that hold me tight and calm me down on that day when I totally lost control of my feeling. That's make me manage to accompany her, take care of her, support her at the rest of the day untill the day she was discharged.
The scary feeling keep on haunted me after the accident, even though when she's in the hospital, I still cry very often. Everytime she has to bear with the pain, my heart is broken. That day, I try to rest and sleep after taking care of her for whole night, but ended up wake up and cry. The scary feeling haunted me a lot~ That's why~
I am sorry friend, if I have follow you back to the bus, maybe you wont been hit and get injured.
I am sorry friend, your best friend here is always blur blur. Even though, you were on the bed in hospital, you still worry about me and keep on remind me this and that.
I am sorry friend, I am not able to support you when you fainted in hospital. The scars on my hand now is the punishment to me.
I am sorry friend, I am not strong enough on the day you accident.
Luckily you are alright..
and thank you so much because you are alright.
I can't bear the pain of losing somebody else anymore.
So, thank you for being alright.
Thank you to our lecturer and his wife~ Dr Loh and Dr Foo.
Thank you to Sheen Yee, because you are there to keep me strong when I needed support so I can support her.
Thank you to all friends and coursemates for concerning her.
Thank you to all those that help up..
Girl, I want you to come back to class very soon with healthy you.. and we can discuss about our anime as usual, eat together, walk together, sit together, laugh together, gossip together..otherwise, I ll be very lonely..

I am so lazy~

Just passed my 21st birthday~
It's new year~ welcome 2009~
and I am so lazy..
Lazy to blog~
Even though it does pop up many many times in my mind~
But when there is free time,
I just can't stop from watching anime..
I can't pull myself out from D. Gray Man..
What a nice anime!

I am so lazy~
Even the new sem started..
But I can't wait to go back for chinese new year~
I miss home so much~
I wanna go home..

New year~
New wishes~
New life~

I need some motivation~